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Revenge of The Clowns And The New GOP Presidential Circus

Revenge of The Clowns, And The New GOP Presidential Circus!

The Barnum & Baily Circus may be ending its 124 year run in May 2017, but the circus isn’t over yet, not by a long run my friends. Due to unpopular demand, the circus has reformed and set up their big top in Washington, D.C. for an open-ended limited engagement in our nation’s capitol.

All New GOP Presidential Circus

OH!, and great news the elephants, and the amazing freak show are back as well. Tickets are on sale right now!

Let’s meet the brand new cast of characters. You will truly be horrified, thrilled, and amazed.

First, the Russian-GOP Circus has a brand new head clown. I am truly excited about this one.

First up, meet, Braggadocious Blowhard Trump, the new Russian-GOP Presidential Clown.

Braggadocious Blowhard Trump the Russian Clown

Braggadocious Blowhard Trump, the Russian Clown – Is a former reality TV star and pretends to be a billionaire. He gives a somewhat erratic performance and has multiple routines which include; racist, xenophobic, bigoted, misogynistic, authoritarian, homophobic, rants and raves to the delight of the crowds.  What’s really hilarious, he also pretends to be in charge, and as an extra bonus, he has a very active, alternative facts, Twitter account.

Believe me, when I say that you will not be disappointed with his wacky rants coupled with his sixth-grade vocabulary, this is family fun at it’s best.  He is absolutely destined to be a crowd favourite. Personally, I believe his denial of the Russian collusion routine is especially entertaining.

Next meet, The Ring Master, Comrade Manafort

Ring Master Comrade Manafort

The Ring Master, Comrade Paul Manafort – Comrade Manafort has deep Russian ties and is responsible for getting the long-term booking of the GOP Circus to Washington, D.C. Comrade Manafort and his Russian pals helped Braggadocious Blowhard Trump, the new Russian-GOP Clown, and arranged for his long-term engagement in Washington, D.C. as well as the return of the elephants, and the freak show. On top ot that, Comrade Manafort also arranged for a brand new big top tent, the biggest, most beautiful big top tent ever built.

The Ringmaster, Comrade Paul Manafort, also has an amazing act where he launders piles of dirty money and makes it disappear it right before your eyes. It really is mind-boggling. Once again, it’s really good fun for the entire family.

Next Up, meet Comrade Stone, the Magnificant.

Comrade Stone the Magnificent

I can’t say enough about Comrade Stone The Magnificent’s act. He is another one from the Russian contingent of the Presidential GOP Circus. Comrade Stone the Magnificent is a mentalist. This guy tries to make you believe anything. He will attempt to make you believe that the sky is red, trees are blue, up is down, and down is up. He is truly amazing. Just beware that your sense of reality will be severely challenged after watching his act.  I will say that his act is probably inappropriate for the un-educated as well as small children.

And now for my favourite part of the GOP Presidential Circus, THE GOP PRESIDENTIAL CIRCUS FREAK SHOW. I love the freak show, it has been missing from the GOP Presidential Circus for years, but now it’s back. I am getting my tickets as soon as I can. I am not going to miss this. This is a once in a lifetime event.

Let’s meet the freak show, The Circus Barker, is Sean “The Lapdog” Spicer. This guy is one of my favourites.

Profound Revelations is proud to bring you exclusive video of one of his recent performances.

This is the ultimate in family entertainment.The GOP Presidential Circus couldn’t have picked a better Circus Barker than Sean, “The Lapdog” Spicer.  This guy calls it like it is, not matter how outrageous his statements may be.

And now for my absolute favourite member of the GOP Presidential Circus Freak Show. Meet Kellyann “The Contortionist” Conway.

Kellyann “The Contortionist” Conway

Kellyann “The Contortionist” Conway – is just like Wonder Woman, she can deflect anything and everything directed at her, watch her carefully as she twists and ties herself up in knots to avoid answering any question throws at her. Her performance is truly mind boggling.

Here’s another exclusive video from Profound Revelations that will give you a feel for just how awesome her act is.

And I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the return of the GOP Presidential Circus Elephants. There are a lot of Elephants in this new version of the GOP Presidential Circus.

GOP Elephants

There are many more characters, such as, Michael “Flim Flam” Flynn, Devin “The Collusionist” Nunes, and many others, but I don’t want to give away the entire secret of the GOP Presidential Circus.

Buy your tickets now as the GOP Presidential Circus full run is in doubt, as uncertain economic factors may force an early impeachment or mass resignations.

Unfortunately, the GOP Presidential Circus may have to close early, so buy your tickets right now, and don’t miss out on this amazing family fun, suitable for all ages, See the GOP Presidential Circus now before it closes, and is gone forever.

The Cast of the GOP Presidential Circus

 

As Always,

I Am…..

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy

This article is a work of satire, and news commentary, by Tom Dye, The Safety Guy and is based upon personal opinion and published news stories. The names have not been changed and the innocent will be determined in a court of law.

Sign up as a subscriber today, If you want to be one of the first to receive notifications when new articles are posted. We will never, sell, or give away your email address for any reason whatsoever.

 

Invasion Of The Body Snatchers, Trump Edition, Or Else Insanity Is The New Normal

Invasion Of The Body Snatchers, Trump Edition, Or Else Insanity Is The New Normal.

A banker named David Hannum, in regard to one of Barnum’s hoaxes once said: “There is a sucker born every minute”.  And you know what, he was absolutely right. As it turns out all the misguided people who voted for Donald Trump are just finding that out.

I can understand how the uneducated, and uninformed, as well as those who worked in occupations like mining, steel, and others, felt that electing an outsider who promised to go to Washington and “drain the swamp”  would have a certain appeal. However, what they found out is draining the swamp leaves only a huge pile of shit.

The first red flag moment should have been when Trump filled his cabinet positions with millionaires and billionaires who have done nothing but spent their entire lives screwing the poor and middle class. The rest of his cabinet he filled with; Generals, incompetents and fools. Putting Ben Carson, the retired lunatic neurosurgeon in charge of the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) is just one example.  Danger, Will Robinson, Danger, Danger!

Did this raise any alarm with Trump supporters? Nope! As a matter of fact I actually had a Trump supporter suggest to me that since these are the people who know how to game the system, these are the perfect choices to fix it. Really??? By that fuzzy logic, we should appoint a convicted bank robber, or even a Bernie Madoff type to be Secretary of the Treasury.

Of course, in between and during all this, Trump declared war on his own intelligence agencies and the mainstream media. I can see Trumps issues with his intelligence agencies as he has said on numerous occasions that he is smarter than the Generals and he has a very smart brain, and he alone knows how to defeat ISIS.

As for the war on the mainstream media, Trump attacks virtually every single news organisation that says anything that’s even remotely critical, or calls him out on his blatant falsehoods and lies that he spews out of his mouth every single day. Is this a rational human being? or is this someone who has become a victim of the body snatchers and is following their own alien agenda?

Did the Trump supporters care? Of course not! I mean Fuck the media and intelligence right?

Let’s not forget the tangled web of Russian connections. Mike Flynn the National Intelligence Advisor was even forced to step down because of them. Trump’s son-in-law and Flynn actually met with the Russian Ambassador at Trump tower, and yet Trump knows nothing about it. Most of Trumps high-level advisors during the campaign during the time that out intelligence agencies said that the Russians were actively interfering with our election met with high-level Russian officials both here and abroad.

Of course, Trump claims that he knows virtually nothing about it, and he did not authorize any communications with the Russians. Did this cause any Trump supporters any concern? Of course not.After all, it’s all fake news right?

Trump signed an executive action banning Muslims that caused chaos in airports worldwide. This was ultimately blocked by the courts as unconstitutional.  So what did Trump do, he just signed another one. Trump claims that this is not a discriminatory religious ban on Muslims. However, the courts used his own words and the statements of his advisors and cabinet officials that it actually was.

Trump is being schooled on the U.S. Constitution and basic civics by the courts. were Trump’s supporters concerned about this blatant attack on out constitution? Of course not! As a matter of fact, they enthusiastically supported it. Thank God for the ACLU and many others who fought for our civil rights as well as those of others.

In the middle of this like a long-buried WWII bomb suddenly expolding, Early on a Saturday morning, Trump tweeted that former President Obama had ordered Trump tower to be wire-tapped. He was not clear if Obama dressed in all black, crept around Trump tower and did it personally, or ordered it done by one of our intelligence agencies. Either way, these allegations exploded across the media like the bombshell that it was.

Trump offered no proof or evidence for these outrageous claims. If true this would be a far, far, bigger scandal that watergate. Accusing a former president of a serious felony with no proof or evidence is outrageous. Virtually every official involved in intellegence from the FBI Director, to Obama’s National Intellegence Director, to congress says emphatically that there is no evidence to support these claims. Did Trump back down or apologise? Nope.

Once this nonsense started blowing up in his face, he changed his tune and said that Obama actually asked the British Intelligence Agency GCHQ to wiretap Trump tower for him. What??? What the fuck is he talking about?

Maybe it went down something like this:

Ring, Ring, Ring…
GCHQ, Simon speaking,
Obama: Simon, it’s Barack I need a favor.
GCHQ; Anything for you old chap, what do you need?
Obama: I need you to wiretap that sleze Donald Trump and Trump Tower in Ney York City.
GCHQ: No problem. I assume this is on the QT?
Obama: You got it.Send me reports on my personal cell.
GCHQ: No problem old chap we will get back to you soon.
Obama: Thanks, Simon I owe you one.

SOUND ABSURD? OF COURSE, IT IS. IT”S FUCKING INSANE!!!!!

When trump was asked about this, he responded,

“We said nothing,” he told the reporter. “All we did was quote a certain very talented legal mind who was the one responsible for saying that on television. I didn’t make an opinion on it. That was a statement made by a very talented lawyer on Fox. So you shouldn’t be talking to me, you should be talking to Fox.”

WHAT KIND OF BULLSHIT ANSWER IS THIS? OBVIOUSLY, TRUMP’S INTELLIGENCE SOURCES ARE FOX NEWS, BREITBART, AND ALEX JONES.

Evidently, the CIA, NSA, DIA, FBI, State Department, etc. are not as reliable as far as he’s concerned.

Were Trump supporters concerned? Of course not.

Trump

I would be extremely remiss if I didn’t mention Trump’s Counceller, Kellyann Conway and Trump’s Press Secretary Sean Spicer. First up, Kellyann Conway. She is the lunatic who coined the term; “alternative facts”  evidently it’s not lying if you call them alternative facts. Kellyann Conway used so many alternative facts that virtually every single mainstream news media refused to have her on their programs. I am fairly certain that she is one of the pod people, as her view on reality is certainly other-worldly. The funny thing is when I was a child, my parents would wash my mouth out with soap for lying. Too bad, I

The funny thing is when I was a child, my parents would wash my mouth out with soap for lying. Too bad, I didn’t know about alternative facts then. I may have gotten away with it.

Sean Spicer, the Whitehouse press Secretary is another winner. He comes out in front of a big crowd of journalists almost every day and spews lies and falsehoods. Spicer actually has the ability to say this with a perfectly straight face. No human being has the ability to do this day in and day out and never crack.

Spicer without his human looking artificial skin

There is only one plausible explanation for this. Sean Spicer is a humanoid robot. As a matter of fact have you ever noticed that Sean Spicer is never seen without the podium in front of him?  Think about that for a moment. I believe that the podium holds the power supplies, micro-processors and wires and cables that control this animatronic.

If you listen to his rants carefully it doesn’t take long to realise that he is nothing more than a computer program. Anytime he is presented with facts or reality, he pauses for a moment as his computer brain has just been presented with a; “bad command or file name that doe’s not compute” a moment later he defaults to one of his pre-programmed responses in an attempt to spin an entirely different reality.

Doe’s this concern Trump supporters? Nope. They buy into it hook, line, and sinker.

Can you believe it, all this happened during Trump’s first 60 days in office.

And then in rapid succession, Trump introduced the Ryan/Trump healthcare plan to replace Obamacare and his budget proposal for the next fiscal year. All of a sudden reality, remember reality? came crashing back in with a vengeance.

Sure Trump supporters thought is was all fun and games until somebody got hurt. They suddenly realised that the people getting hurt were Trump supporters themselves. Suddenly, trump had turned on those who supported them. All the red meat that Trump had been feeding his supporters turned out to be rotten and poisoned.

Trump Supporters

Trump played all his supporters who do not suffer from the ravages of intelligence and basically threw all of them under the bus. All of a sudden Trump supporters do care, but now it’s too late. They have all come to the sudden realisation that you have to be careful what you wish for because you just might get it. Well, they got it. We tried to warn the poor incompetent fools, but they didn’t listen.

The Ryan/Trump healthcare plan will throw 17-24 million people out of affordable healthcare, and drastically raise the cost of healthcare insurance premiums. The plan also eliminates the Medicaid expansion which will mostly affect the States and the very people who voted for him.  Are Trump supporters concerned about this? All of a sudden, they do now.

Trump’s new budget proposal would dramatically slash funding for critical social programs that Trump supporters rely on.

Eliminating the funding for Meals-on-Wheels which is 1/3 of their budget. Meals-on-Wheels feeds one healthy meal per day to low-income seniors, veterans and the disabled. According to Trumps plan, fuck the seniors and disabled, they have been a big enough drain on the rest of us already.

His budget would dramatically cut back on school lunches for the poor,  assistance to pay heating bills for the poor, eliminate funding for PBS and NPR, cut funds for jb training and so much more.

Per New York Magazine, “The president’s budget cuts funding for early-childhood education, public housing, transit, food assistance, and job training — all programs that disproportionately benefit single mothers in cities with low median incomes. And it also abolishes the Appalachian Regional Commission and Rural Business-Cooperative Service, while shrinking the Labor Department — all moves that disadvantage coal miners”. Wow! Trump supporters are definately fucked now.

Here’s a sincere message to all you Trump supporters, even though you drank the kool-aid and were all duped by a con-man, all of us 2.88 million more who did not vote for this minority elected President are working hard to undo the damage you have done. The Resistance, as we are called welcome you to the good fight, and together we can reverse this abomination that you have caused.

Together, we can and will remove the invasion of the body snatchers and restore truth and justice back to our democracy. We will not allow lying to become the new normal, nor will we allow the elderly, poor and disabled to suffer the brunt of Trump’s dark dystopian vision of America.

Regretful Trump Supporter

Gil Scott-Heron once sang about how; “The Revolution Will Not Be Televised” Well this time around it is. We of the Resistance are not only fighting for ourselves, but for all those who were duped by Trump the con-man, and everyone else. Denounce Trump and join us.  Together we can make a better world for both me and you.

I am going to leave you with this final thought…

Welcome to THE RESISTANCE.

 

As Always,

I Am…..

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy

 

This article is a work of satire by Tom Dye, The Safety Guy, ans is based on actual news events. Become a subscriber today, it’s totally free. You will be the first to be informed when new articles are posted. profoundrevelations.com is grateful for your continued support.

Twitter Is Dangerous 140 Characters At A Time!

Twitter Is Dangerous 140 Characters At A Time!

Don’t get me wrong, I have a Twitter account. You can feel free to follow me any anytime. My Twitter handle is: @NeutronTom.

Twitter is great for sharing a YouTube video, or a link to a news story, or even a short question, statement, or announcement.

However, in the wrong hands, Twitter is dangerous. Twitter sucks when it comes to conveying emotion, background, or complex ideas. After all, how much detail can you convey when you are constrained to 140 characters?

Think about it for a moment how much complex thought, facts, and an intelligent argument can you get across to others when you have to carefully parse your words to 140 characters or less?

I don’t know about you, but it takes me more than 140 characters just to get the basic concept of exactly what you are trying to tell me.

(By the way, the above sentence took 139 characters just for me to convey a simple point on my thought processes.)

As an example of where reality slams headlong to the absurd let’s take a look at recent from tweets from Donald Trump. This is one person who consistently proves beyond a reasonable doubt that Twitter is dangerous.

(1) Donald J. Trump

Terrible! Just found out that Obama had my “wires tapped” in Trump Tower just before the victory. Nothing found. This is McCarthyism!

04 Mar 2017, 6:35 AM – 4 Mar 2017

(2) Donald J. Trump

Is it legal for a sitting President to be “wire tapping” a race for president prior to an election? Turned down by court earlier. A NEW LOW!

4 Mar 2017, 6:45 AM

(3) Donald J. Trump

How low has President Obama gone to tapp my phones during the very sacred election process. This is Nixon/Watergate. Bad (or sick) guy!

04 Mar 2017, 7:02 AM

Wow! these three tweets comprising a total of 420 characters (including spaces) are allegations of a huge political and legal bombshell. If true, this would be a bigger scandal than Watergate during the downfall of the Nixon Presidency. No, actually that’s wrong. Because of laws passed since The Nixon Watergate scandal, if true, this would be the biggest political scandal in modern times.

Let that sink in for a moment. A sitting President accuses the former President of serious crimes without proof or evidence, all in series of three tweets for a grand total of 420 characters.

Now let’s remove the Twitter character limit and imagine a statement which included the full details and background and see if it makes any more sense.

(Donald Trump’s full statement) – I can tell you I am really disturbed. The other night I was listening to The Alex Jones show you know that right-wing Conspiracy show and Alex was talking about how former President Obama personally tapped my phones at Trump Tower. This story was picked up the very next day by the website Breitbart News, you know the Alt Right fake news website.

This is outrageous and total McCarthyism. I have said this like a million times, just because virtually every one of my high-level campaign aides and even at least two of my cabinet officials met with Russian Intelligence Officers and the Russian Ambassador. Hell, my Son -in-law Justin Kushner and my now former National Intelligence Director, Michael Flynn even met with The Russian Ambassador at trump Tower. But like I said it was really nothing, and I know absolutely nothing about it. Believe me when I tell you this is nothing more than fake news.

Is it even legal for a sitting President to wire tap another Presidential candidate? I mean this is total nonsense that the Russians interfered with the election just to help me win is total nonsense. By the way Thank You, Vlad. I mean seriously, our intelligence agencies don’t really know. I mean I know a lot more than them when it comes to intelligence, after all, I have a very good brain.

Believe me, it’s true when I said that this was actually a 400-pound guy living in his mother’s basement in New Jersey and we will be presenting evidence to the congress in the near future.

Obama is a bad or sick guy and I am making it my life’s mission to destroy him, both politically, and personally, because he made fun of me at the White House Correspondence Dinner in 2011.

Stay tuned folks as we are going to prove that not only did Obama personally tap my wires at Trump Tower, Obama and the U.S. Intelligence community made up all these so called Russian connections just because they are all Democrats and sore losers.

And furthermore, I am going to present evidence to congress that proves that I actually won the popular vote fair and square as well. Those so called 2.88 million more people that supposedly voted for Hillary Clinton were all illegal votes from undocumented illegal immigrants and people who were bussed in by the thousands by bus from Massachusetts to New Hampshire or Vermont to vote illegally.

Just like my inaugural crowd was by far the biggest in U.S. history. Obama supporters in the U.S. Parks Department doctored the photos just to make me look bad. Believe me, I was there the crowd was yuggeeee!

I will sue everyone involved, just wait and see. Believe me.

God bless me and the United States of America.
(Donald Trump, 4:37 AM, from the Florida Whitehouse at Mar a Lago)

As the late Paul Harvey used to say; “Now You Know The Rest Of The Story”.

Is Twitter dangerous? I believe that for a lot of people it truly is. Only you can decide. Follow me on Twitter (@NeutronTom) to find out for yourself.

As Always,

I Am…..

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy

This essay and news commentary is an original work of satire by; Tom Dye, The Safety Guy.
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