Tales oF the Absurd, Original Satire, Politics & News Commentary

Month: September 2016 (Page 1 of 5)

Donald Trump Isn’t a Savior, He’s a Con Man

Donald Trump Isn’t a Savior, He’s a Con Man.

I am not so naive as to believe that this article will change the minds of any hardcore Donald Trump supporters.

Just look at all the lies he’s told. Trump’s xenophobic, racist, bigoted and misogynistic comments and statements literally don’t seem to matter his supporters.

If this was any other Presidential candidate ever in history he would have been doomed long before they could ever get this far in the Presidential race.

The mindset and ignorance of a good percentage of certain groups and individual supporters of Donald Trump frankly scare me and it should scare you as well.

How is it even possible that as a society could we have gone so far off the rails that a candidate for President of the United Stated could even be someone like Donald Trump? Even our founding fathers couldn’t have seen this coming.

Trump supporters have become a giant negative feedback loop that somehow blinds them to the lies right in front of them. It is simply stunning and frankly it’s not funny anymore.

With that being said, today I wanted to post just a sampling of Trump stories from one day from multiple news websites. These are just a sampling of the stories posted on only “one day”, on September 29, 2016.

From: www.





OK, you get the general idea. Multiple news sites publishing multiple  Donald Trump news stories everyday.

I know, I know, right-wing conservatives will scream; Liberal Media, Mainstream Media, Corporate Media, Gotcha Media, Lies, etc., etc., etc.

No it’s not. This entire concept was created by Sarah Palin in 2008 when Katie Couric had the gall to ask Sarah Palin what newspapers she read. Palin called this a “Gotcha” question from the lame-stream media.

I never understood how a softball question like “What newspapers do you read everyday” is somehow a trick question. Considering Sarah Palin couldn’t answer it just revealed how much of an idiot she was, and still is for that matter.

Donald Trump has kept up the same tradition, only on steroids. Donald Trump will actually says something, and one hour later deny he ever said it. Still his supporters literally ignore all of this. WTF???

Donald Trump is quite obviously the most dangerous person that has ever run for President of the United States.

How could anyone ever still support Donald Trump after all of this, is way, way. beyond me.

Maybe some of you have greater insights about human psychology then I do. If you have some deeper understanding of psychology and would care to enlighten me please post a comment below.

Somehow, independent fact-checking has become a bad thing to Trump and his supporters. Since when did the truth become negotiable or open to interpretation?

You will notice that I did not include any news stories from: breitbart, infowars, drudge report, or Fox News.

This omission is deliberate on my part, mostly because these outlets somehow see the same facts and spin them into an entirely different reality. These quasi news outlets have their own agendas and truth is certainly not important to their particular point of view.

Here’s a video with some interesting insights:

If you reject the facts because they do not match your own beliefs, the facts are not wrong. The only thing that is wrong is your view of reality.

I am in no way advocating that you just take my word for anything. I encourage you to do your own independent research cross checked from multiple sources, and then make up your own mind.

Think about that.

Is Donald Trump a savior or a con-man?  I believe the facts speak for themselves. But, only you can decide for yourself.

As Always,

I Am,

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy

NASA Just Updated The Astrological Signs, And Evidently My Entire Life Has Been A Lie!

NASA Just Updated The Astrological Signs, And Evidently My Entire Life Has Been A Lie!

What the fuck NASA! I always liked and respected you guys, and now you have made my 58 years on this earth and everything that everyone has ever believed about me, and even what I believe myself a total lie.

I am deadly serious about this. This is like waking up one morning and suddenly finding out you are actually someone else. I have actually seen science fiction movies with similar story-lines.

Seriously, this time NASA went way, way, too far. with their esoteric nerdy science stuff. So, what did the genius nerds at NASA do now that virtually made my entire life, and yours a total lie?

I’ll tell you what they did, they changed the entire fucking zodiac, that’s what. On top of that they created a thirteenth zodiac sign, Ophiuchus. I can’t even pronounce it, none the less spell it.Thank God, for cut and paste.

This is a total outrage! For centuries before I was born, and the first 58 years of my life there were twelve zodiac signs.


As far as I can tell everyone was perfectly content with these twelve zodiac signs and we were perfectly content to have our lives defined by these twelve zodiac categories. Was this good enough for the NASA science geeks? Oh no! They couldn’t  just leave well enough alone, they had to throw a wrench into everyone’s lives.

Take me as an example. For 58 years I have always been a Pieces. According to astrology, a Pieces male is defined as someone who is:

“Powerfully emotional, intuitive, creative and caring, the Pisces man is sensitive and often your most trusted friend. Often exceptionally attractive, his most endearing traits are his humility and love of romance. Spiritual, mysterious, imaginative and idealistic this man is one of the dreamers of the zodiac”.

Don’t get me wrong, I never defined my life by the zodiac, but I did kind of think that the words in bold did kind of describe me in very general terms. Others, that know me well would agree as well.

You see, actually, I am a huge believer in science, and rational thought. My whole life has been based upon this premise. Here is a great video of the great Carl Sagan discussing astrology;

My rock solid belief in science doe’s not mitigate what the science geeks at NASA have done now. My entire 58 years on this planet I have been a Pieces. Now, according to NASA, I am suddenly with a snap of their little science geek fingers… a….wait for it…Aquarius! Yes it’s true.

I even used to check my daily horoscope in the newspaper. remember newspapers? Just to see what disasters may headed my way. Not that I actually believed that, but one can never be too careful right?

According to astrology, an Aquarius male is defined as someone who is:

Unpredictable, intelligent, social, independent and excellent communicators. Some of the negative Aquarius characteristics include unreliability, stubbornness, indecision, and inflexibility”.

Wait a minute!!!! That sort of sounds a lot like me as well. WTF?????

Now, I am having a serious identity crisis!

WTF, I am now the exact same astrological sign as my mother-in-law. Don’t get me wrong, I love her dearly, but we are seriously nothing alike.

According to the social order destroying geeks at NASA the new zodiac signs and date are now:

Capricorn: Jan 20 – Feb 16

Aquarius: Feb 16 – March 11

Pisces: March 11 – April 18

Aries: April 18 – May 13

Taurus: May 13 – June 21

Gemini: June 21 – July 20

Cancer: July 20 – Aug 10

Leo: Aug 10 – Sept 16

Virgo: Sept 16 – Oct 30

Libra: Oct 30 – Nov 23

Scorpio: Nov 23 – Nov 29

Ophiuchus: Nov 29 – Dec 17

Sagittarius: Dec 17 – Jan 20

So why did NASA decide to upend 86% of the people of earth’s population by changing their zodiac sign?

From, According to NASA; ” the Earth’s axis has changed in the 3,000 years since the zodiac was first invented. As a result, the constellations over which the sun appears to move over have shifted over time. It also pointed out that the sun also moves over a 13th constellation, which the Babylonians deigned not to include in the zodiac in order to preserve their 12-month calendar”.

The origins of the zodiac come from a time when early astronomers believed that the universe was geocentric, that is, that, everything in the revolves around the Earth. Early civilizations examined the heavens in a search for patterns that could explain how everything worked. Many people ascribed meaning to patterns of stars in the sky, giving rise to the idea of constellations of stars that represented various aspects of their respective mythologies. As time went on, humans would chart the movements of these constellations and realize that there were predictable patterns in the night sky. These predictions would form the backbone of both astronomy and astrology, as early scientific observation mixed with superstition.

The Ancient Babylonians divided the ancient sky into 12 pieces, each 30 degrees apart, which followed the sun as it supposedly traveled around the Earth over the course of a year. Each piece was represented by a constellation to serve as a landmark for early as the sun crossed over the position of each of the 12 constellations in turn. The segments of the zodiac was an important early celestial coordinate system that provided early astronomers and astrologers with a more sophisticated understanding of the night sky. But, as the heliocentric model took hold in Europe in the 17th century, astronomers abandoned the system. Astrologers stuck with the zodiac holding on to the mystic notion that the movement of the stars could predict the future.

So, who are we going to blame for this debacle? NASA? I think not as they were just the messenger. I blame the ancient Babylonians and current astronomers.

Considering that all the ancient Babylonians are all dead, I am placing the blame squarely upon the current astronomers. Seriously, you would thing that just one of them would have said, “Listen guys, things have changed. Here’s the new deal”. Did we hear that from anyone? Nope!!!!

Which brings up another interesting question. Why didn’t astrologers or psychics predict this?

I suppose I should look at the bright side, I could have been a Virgo. Virgo’s entire sign is now just 7 days long. Talking about getting the short stick.

I would have rather been moved into the Ophiuchus zodiac sign, because it is brand new and no one has yet to define exactly what it means. At least I could have started over with a clean slate.

But for me, that has not how the stars have aligned. I will just have to learn to live as an Aquarius. The funny thing is, both Pieces and Aquarius are water signs, and I can’t even swim.

Seriously, I can’t swim at all. Well maybe I could swim for 40-50 feet or so if a shark was after me, although it would have to be a really big one, or I will have drowned long before it got to me.  Go figure.

Sometimes, I think that the universe is just mocking me.

I suppose it could be worse. I have seen a lot of people with a tattoo of their zodiac sign, and birth-date, tattooed somewhere on their body. I guess they will just have to cross out the old one, and add their new zodiac sign. Try explaining that to your friends and family.

As Always,

I Am,

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy

No, Black Protesters Do Not Hate White People!

No, Black Protesters Do Not Hate White People!

Right wing nut job, Rep. Robert Pittenger (R-N.C.) actually said: “The grievance in their mind, the animus, the anger they hate white people because white people are successful and they’re not,”

This is a blatant lie. and a patently false assumption!

Donald Trump actually suggested that drugs are “a very big factor” in the Charlotte protests on Friday.

Another blatant falsehood!

People I know personally at work were talking about how something should be done about the protesters.

These type of comments  ignorant and also totally miss the point!

These comments are just a couple of examples of the multitude of ignorant misconceptions, and outright lies told about why protests are occurring in Charlotte, and many other cities across America.

Seriously, can’t anyone see the stupidly obvious answer right in front of your faces? Do I really have to spell this out for you?

Black people do not hate white people. All any one wants is the same equal opportunity that everyone else has.

Seriously, it is just as simple as that.

If you  want to stop the protests, stop shooting unarmed black males.

Does it get any more simple then this?

Black males are killed by Police at a 3:1 ratio as while males. This number is shocking. The videos I have watched are disturbing to say the least. When I was younger, If I was pulled over by the Police, they didn’t yell at me. or approach my vehicle with their guns drawn. Then again, I am not a black male.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not anti-Police at all. I believe that the Police need to take a new non-confrontational community approach to law enforcement.. Here’s a perfect example from Gainesville, Florida. Now talk about building community relations.

Economic recovery and investments are being made in cities as well as small towns all across America. That is except within the black communities.

Is the answer becoming clearer now?

W.T.F., It the answer is perfectly clear. The Police should stop killing unarmed black males, and the revitalization of communities should include not only black communities, but all economically depressed areas as well.

I am going to use as an example the small town, and area that I live in. I live in Hernando, County Florida. According to the United States census  from July 2015, Hernando County has a population of; 178, 439 people.  90.4% are white and 5.4% are black.

I drive 65 miles to work each way so I have a lot of time to observe my surroundings. My observations are that a majority of people pulled over by the Police are black. Which is interesting as only 5.4% of the population is black. Are black drivers worse than white drivers? I find this doubtful.

There is a lot of improvements being done in Hernando County, new sidewalks, etc. But as far as I can tell not much improvements are being done in predominately black neighborhoods.

One can only assume that a similar pattern exists in cities and small towns all across the country.

My neighbors are political activists, and they have been working with the local black community. One of the issues they are trying to address in partnership with black community leaders is the unique problems facing the local black community.

Since this is the South, you see many black areas where people set-up smokers, and sell smoked barbecue. I have to say that this home-made barbecue is AMAZING, as well as affordable.

Not to mention how my street and neighborhood is fairly clean and neat. The City takes care of it. The black and economically depressed neighborhoods not so much. How about grants and  community investments so the economically depressed areas can create vibrant neighborhoods that we can be proud of.

One of the issues my neighbors are working on with the black community and the City is to create new sidewalks, lighting and other improvements to create new sidewalks and paved, or concrete turn-offs, as well as easy licensing for these local entrepreneurs , so that these type of vendors can not only make a living, but create new economic opportunities, not only for their own neighborhood, bit for the entire town as well. .

These type of ideas would not only improve black areas but create new economic opportunities for the entire community.

Of course, this is just one local economic example. There needs to be  a whole slew of specific, tailored economic opportunities made available, depending upon the unique requirements of black communities all across America.

Economic development and investment capital needs to be made in black communities. Jobs, businesses, and infrastructure improvements needs to be made in black communities in equal footing as white communities.

Affordable business loans, job training, and economic investments in local communities lowers crime rates and creates economic opportunities for everyone, not just the black community, but for the entire community as a whole.

The solution is simple. Equal opportunities for all, creates the economic engine that integrates society as a whole.

Furthermore, The Police should not be pulling over black Americans at a rate any higher than white, Hispanic, or native Americans. Respect for one another as Americans goes a long way.

Do Black Americans hate white people? Of course not, all they want is the same thing that everybody else wants, and that’s “Equal Opportunity For All”

As, Always,

I Am,

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy


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