A Little Love And Respect For Others Would Make The World A Lot Better Place

This is a companion article to a story I wrote recently. Previously, I wrote about “Familiarity” as being the primary basis for understanding others that are different than you. If you’re interested, you can read it here:  http://profoundrevelations.com/2016/10/07/people-fear-others-different/

However, this article is more about the basic fundamentals of respect for others.

People talk about respect for others all the time, but what doe’s it actually mean?

According to the Mirriam-Websters dictionary, respect is defined as:

A feeling of admiring someone or something that is good, valuable, important, etc. :a feeling or understanding that someone or something is important, serious, etc., and should be treated in an appropriate way. : a particular way of thinking about or looking at something.

But respect for a fellow human being is so much more than a simple definition from a dictionary. Respect is the little things. Respect is simple human decency.

Aretha Franklin sang about it in 1967.

To respect someone else, do I have to agree with their lifestyle?  the way they dress?  their religion? politics? sexual orientation? Do they have to have the same skin color as me?

No, of course not!

For me, the concept of respect is really quite simple. Respect, is the simple acknowledgment and validation of the values, beliefs and lifestyle of another person as a fellow human being.  Think about that for a second.

Respect for others is also about throwing out the stereotypes and bias you have about others, especially someone you don’t even know. Every human being on this planet is unique in their own way. Every person has value.

Here’s an example or respect that we can all relate to. If I am going into, a building or a store, I automatically hold the door for anyone else coming in behind me.

I hold the door open for everyone even if I have to wait several seconds for them to catch up. I am talking about literally everyone; young, old, overweight, underweight, Blacks, Hispanics, Asians, men, women and everyone else in between.

I have learned one important thing by performing this simple act of kindness. I learned that the most scary, looking gang-banger types will inevitably, smile and say thank you.  Well, most everyone. Believe it or not, the ones most often to just walk past me, and say nothing at all, are mostly elderly white women. Go figure.

How about when you are standing next to a stranger in line or other, public place, do you just ignore that living breathing human being standing right next to you? Or do you acknowledge them by at least say hello, Comment about the weather or whatever? I do.

In my position in my career field, I am in a position of management. When I need someone to do something, I habitually approach them with “Could you do me a favor?” or “I need your help”. This approach is nothing more than a sign of respect for another. They actually don’t have a choice if I ask, however, I respect them and the job they do.

A pat on the back, a joke, a fist bump, or handshake in recognition of a job well done also goes a long in showing someone you respect them and acknowledge the value of not only them as a person but also the value of their work.

Don’t confuse my kindness or respect for others with weakness. I still have a job to do. If someone makes me be an asshole,I will. However, this is something I find distasteful.

I greet everyone at work with the same respect that I show for the President of the company. It makes no difference to me if the employee’s job is to empty the garbage or you are the one in charge of everything. Respect and kindness go a long way.

You should try it sometime.

In today’s highly charged partisan political environment, people are more divided than ever before. I have friends, really good friends, that for some reason are strong  supporters of the other parties candidate for President. Their candidate is someone that I wouldn’t support, even if he was the only candidate on the ballot. In that case, I would just write my own name in.

We respectfully debate back and forth either in person, through Facebook or on the phone. Do I think any different of them just because I don’t agree with their politics, absolutely not! I may feel that they are misguided, but they are still my friends and we have a lot of history and good times we shared, and still share.

Respect for other people’s beliefs is critically important. I don’t have to agree with them, but I still respect them as a person. Besides, there is often a lot of common ground between us. Politics, religion or whatever belief system a person has is only a small part of their character as a whole.

I make it point of talking to as many of my fellow employees as I can at work. We have an extremely diverse 370  person workforce.  I often ask people on Monday’s if they had a good weekend, and ask if they did anything special.

I am past being surprised when the person who on the surface it would seem that I have the least in common with, casually mentions how they did something like, a home remodeling project or refinishing a piece of furniture or whatever.

Hey, I like home remodeling projects, and I enjoy remodeling furniture as well. This seemingly minor bit of conversation enabled us to create a deeper connection and discover some common ground between us. This has often lead to some interesting conversations and we both learn something new from each other. Often, we both walk away with a with a level of respect and understanding that didn’t exist previously.

In my experience, Often people in low paying jobs didn’t have the same education or opportunities in life that I had. I make it my mission to help people the best I can. I work with them, try to teach them new skills and explain how to succeed.

You would be surprised how people blossom when someone takes the time to mentor them,  offer words of encouragement, and teach them new skills. This opens the doors to new economic opportunities.  Isn’t this what we should all be doing?

It seems perfectly clear to me kindness, love, and respect for one another go a long way in creating an atmosphere where when you are kind and respect others, the chances are good that they will respect you as well.

The stereotypes and bias that everyone has are nothing more than a false narrative on actual reality.

The simplest way to break this cycle is to take the initiative and show a little kindness, love, and respect for our fellow human beings.

You might be surprised, that you find more common ground between yourself and someone who is seemingly the polar opposite then you than you might think.

Isn’t it worth finding out?

Of course, not everyone will get along for one reason or another, this is just human nature. But that doesn’t mean that a little kindness, civility, and respect won’t go a long way in mitigating our responses to one another.

Here is one last thing to consider. In life, I judge everyone by only one of two categories. You are either an asshole or you’re not an asshole. It’s really that simple. Everything else, religion, politics, sexual orientation, lifestyle, race, creed or culture really just doesn’t matter. It’s who you are as a person that counts.

Think about it.

 

As Always,

I Am,

Tom Dye, The Safety Guy